Research on Treating Affair Couples

Conceptual and Clinical Approaches

In collaborative work with Dr. Donald Baucom (University of North Carolina) and Dr. Kristi Gordon (University of Tennessee), we've conceptualized extramarital affairs as comprising an interpersonal trauma.

We've described how forgiveness may be a key element in promoting recovery from affairs and have outlined a three-stage treatment model: (1) Absorbing the blow (minimizing additional damage and re-establishing equilibrium), (2) Giving meaning (identifying contributing risk factors and developing a shared formulation), and (3) Moving forward (examining beliefs about forgiveness and reaching an informed relationship decision).

Our research has involved the first empirical investigations of a conjoint treatment designed specifically to assist couples in recovering from an affair. Overall, our findings offer preliminary support for this new treatment approach and suggest additional avenues for research as well as potential modifications of the treatment to increase its overall effectiveness.

References for this work include the following:

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2000). The use of forgiveness in marital therapy. In M. E. McCullough, K. I. Pargament, & C. E. Thoresen (Eds.), Forgiveness: Theory, research, and practice (pp. 203-227). New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2004). An integrative intervention for promoting recovery from extramarital affairs. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 30, 213-231.

Snyder, D. K., Gordon, K. C., & Baucom, D. H. (2004). Treating affair couples: Extending the written disclosure paradigm to relationship trauma. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 11, 155-160.

Baucom, D. H., Gordon, K. C., & Snyder, D. K. (2005). Treating affair couples: An integrative approach. In J. Lebow (Ed.), Clinical handbook of family therapy (pp. 431-463). New York, NY: John Wiley.

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2005). Forgiveness in couples: Divorce, affairs, and couple therapy. In E. Worthington (Ed.), Handbook of forgiveness (pp. 407-421). New York, NY: Brunner-Routledge.

Allen, E. S., Atkins, D. C., Baucom, D. H., Snyder, D. K., Gordon, K. C., & Glass, S. P. (2005). Intrapersonal, interpersonal, and contextual factors in engaging in and responding to extramarital involvement. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 12, 101-130.

Snyder, D. K. (2005). Treatment of clients coping with infidelity: An introduction. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 61, 1367-1370.

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2005). Treating couples recovering from infidelity: An integrative approach. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 61, 1393-1405.

Snyder, D. K., & Doss, B. D. (2005). Treating infidelity: Clinical and ethical directions. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 61, 1453-1465.

Baucom, D. H., Gordon, K. C., Snyder, D. K., Atkins, D. C., & Christensen, A. (2006). Treating affair couples: Clinical considerations and initial findings. Journal of Cognitive Psychotherapy, 20, 375-392.

Whisman, M. A., & Snyder, D. K. (2007). Sexual infidelity in a national survey of American women: Differences in prevalence and correlates as a function of method of assessment. Journal of Family Psychology, 21, 147-154.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, K. C. (2007). Treating infidelity: An integrative approach to resolving trauma and promoting forgiveness. In P. R. Peluso (Ed.), Infidelity: A practitioner's guide to working with couples in crisis (pp. 99-126). New York: Routledge.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, K. C. (2007). Getting past the affair: A program to help you cope, heal, and move on. New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., Snyder, D. K., & Dixon, L. (2008). Couple therapy and the treatment of affairs. In A. S. Gurman Ed.), Clinical handbook of couple therapy (4th ed.) (pp. 429-458). New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Gordon, K. C., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2008). Optimal strategies in couple therapy: Treating couples dealing with the trauma of infidelity. Journal of Contemporary Psychotherapy, 38, 151-160.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, C. K. (2008). An integrative approach to treating infidelity. The Family Journal: Counseling and Therapy for Couples and Families, 16, 300-307.

Baucom, D. H., Snyder, D. K., & Gordon, K. C. (2009). Helping couples get past the affair: A clinician's guide. New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Snyder, D. K., Gasbarrini, M. F., Doss, B. D., & Scheider, D. M. (2011). Intervening with military couples struggling with issues of infidelity. Journal of Contemporary Psychotherapy, 41, 201-208.

Snyder, D. K., Balderrama-Durbin, C., & Fissette, C. (2012). Treating infidelity and comorbid depression: A case study involving military deployment. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 1, 213-225.

Snyder, D. K., Balderrama-Durbin, C., Fissette, C., Scheider, D. M., Barnett, J. K., & Fiala, S. (2012). Infidelity. In B. A. Moore (Ed.), Handbook of counseling military couples (pp. 219-235). New York, NY: Routledge.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., Gordon, K. C., & Doss, B. D. (2012). Infidelity and other relationship betrayals. In D. K. Snyder & C. M. Monson (Eds.), Couple-based interventions for military and veteran families: A practitioner's guide (pp. 90-121). New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Gordon, K. C., Khaddouma, A. M., Baucom, D. H., & Snyder, D. K. (2015). Couple therapy and the treatment of affairs. In A. S. Gurman , J. Lebow, & D. K. Snyder (Eds.), Clinical handbook of couple therapy (5th ed.) (pp. 412-444). New York, NY: Guilford Press.

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, K. C. (2016).Treating infidelity. In S. B. Levine, C. B. Risen, & S. E. Althof (Eds.), Handbook of clinical sexuality for mental health professionals (3rd ed.) (pp. 209-220). New York, NY: Routledge.

The following books are available from Guilford Publications:

Snyder, D. K., Baucom, D. H., & Gordon, K. C. (2007). Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You Cope, Heal, and Move On. New York: Guilford Press.

(Also available in Korean from Hakjisa Publishing, and in Slovak from Aktuell Publishing)

Baucom, D. H., Snyder, D. K., & Gordon, K. C. (2009). Helping Couples Get Past the Affair: A Clinician's Guide. New York: Guilford Press.

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